Awkward Microsoft Store Dances Are Why I Shop Online

Gizmodo: “These staffers at the Microsoft Store in Mission Viejo, CA might seem really excited, but the clearly rehearsed dance routine comes across more like some kind of Stockholm syndrome.”

Netflix May Delay New Release Movies by a Full Month

Lifehacker:

“Netflix has become the savior of home entertainment for many, but recently Netflix has been in talks with major studios about delaying new release movies by a month or more. Why? The major studios are willing to drop the price of the DVDs it sells to Netflix with the understanding that all new release movies wouldn’t be accessible to its customers for up to a full month after release date—presumably in hopes that more people would buy their stupid DVDs. It would cut Netflix’s costs by almost half, but there’s no word yet on if that savings would be passed on to its loyal customers.

So we’re wondering: Would you cancel your subscription if this was the direction your trusty red envelope movie service went? Let’s here it in the comments. Photo by jc.westbrook.”

Retailer Asking For Hefty Discounts [Video Business via Consumerist]

Agassi’s Wild Hair in the 1990s? Yep, a Wig!

Holy crap…

Neatorama:

“Remember the wild hair of Andre Agassi in the 1990s? Yep, you guessed it: a wig!

“I asked myself: you want to wear a toupee? On the tennis court? I answered myself; what else could I do?”

But the wig began to disintegrate as he took a shower the night before the Paris final — “probably I used the wrong hair rinse,” Agassi writes.

He panicked and called his brother Philly into the room. Together, they managed to clamp the wig together using clips and pins.

Agassi, 39, writes: “Of course I could have played without my hairpiece, but what would all the journalists have written if they knew that all the time I was really wearing a wig?

“During the warming-up training before play I prayed. Not for victory, but that my hairpiece would not fall off.

“With each leap, I imagine it falling into the sand. I imagine millions of spectators move closer to their TV sets, their eyes widening and, in dozens of dialects and languages, ask how Andre Agassi’s hair has fallen from his head.”

Link

Impressionist Cake

Boing Boing:

“Flickr user Megpi made this beautiful “impressionist cake.” ZOMG.”

impressionist cake (via Craft)

The worst job of the 19th Century: nipple pinchers vs. anal tobacco blowers vs. tongue pullers in reviving the dead

Boing Boing:

“John Ptak, a dealer in rare science books, writes about all the different ways that people in days of yore used to make sure dead people really were dead.

Perhaps the most spectacularly extension of the nipple-pincher was the tongue-pulling idea of Dr. J.-V. Laborde (1830-1903), a research physician with wide credentials, who reasoned that a continued regimen of advanced and strenuous pulling of a patient’s tongue would over time bring them back to life if alive. This is what leads us to the point of this post: Laborde established a mortuary, and in this mortuary, where the dead were waiting to die, he employed a man whose job it was to pull the tongues of these bodies. In the misty picture of all of this that is painted in my mind’s eye, the fellow working his way from body to body pulling their tongues with a heavy pincer seems far worse than nipple squeezing or even being an anal smoke blower, though to choose between the three in a twisted Purgatorial mandate would be hard to so. Although the nipple pincher wasn’t replaced by anything mechanical, the smoke blower was (by a powerful bellows), and so was our friend the tongue puller, who after complaining of the boredom of his task was pushed aside by an electrical device. I am loathe to report that I cannot find a picture of the machine.”

The Worst Job of the 19th Century? Tongue-Pullers, Nipple-Pinchers & Anal Tobacco Blowers Try to Revive the Dead.

Postal Worker Steals 3200 Netflix DVDs, Faces Up to 5 Years in Prison

Gizmodo:

“Unsolicited advice: If you insist on robbing people, do so quickly. Grab everything in sight and sprint to Mexico. Because when you gradually steal $36,471 of Netflix DVDs from your day job, someone will eventually notice.

Myles Weathers, a (former) postal sorting facility employee from Springfield, Massachusetts, was busted removing DVDs from Netflix envelopes and placing them in his backpack. That’s a little dumb. What’s really dumb is that Weathers was caught on camera following a Netflix investigation as to why all these people in the area were calling in their DVDs as MIA.

Weathers pleaded guilty to the theft of 3012 DVDs (now recovered) valued at $36,471, and he may get up to five years in prison when he’s sentenced this December. Then again, it could be worse.” [The Smoking Gun via CrunchGear and image]

“Insane killer” who was treated to a day at a county fair escapes

Boing Boing:

“What could be wrong with taking an insane killer to the country fair? Oh, yeah.”

Insane killer escapes on trip to county fair (Via Bits & Pieces)

Thief Nabbed After Forgetting To Log Out Of Facebook During Robbery

Gizmodo:

“Joining our ever-increasing pantheon of stupid criminals, we have one 19-year old Pennsylvania man who was nabbed after forgetting to log out of his Facebook account at the scene of the crime.

Why the hell would someone stop to check Facebook on a computer owned by the person you’re robbing? Facebook addiction is a serious problem folks. Mark my words—its only a matter of time before some idiot felon gives a play-by-play tweet session of a crime in progress. Hell, it’s probably already happened.” [Mashable]

Boy Cries Blood

Vampire?

Derren Brown Blog: “U.S Teenager Calvino Inman is currently seeking medical help for a mystery condition which causes him to cry tears of blood. After a series of tests, doctors still cannot work out what would cause the condition which sees Calvino crying blood up to 3 times a day.”

Disney To Acquire Marvel Entertainment for $4 Billion

/Film:

According to the New York Times (via Topless Robot), Disney has agreed to acquire Marvel Entertainment for $4 billion in cash and stock. This deal gives Disney rights to over Marvel’s 5,000+ characters, not to mention control over Marvel’s licensing, publishing, and film production capabilities. This acquisition is interesting for many reasons, not the least of which is that one year ago Marvel re-upped its contract with Paramount to distribute its next five films, including Iron Man 2, The Avengers, and Thor, among others. Furthermore, there are a plethora of loose ends, licensing-wise, that Disney will have to contend with before this deal starts to show its true worth.

Undoubtedly, the effects of this massive shift in the entertainment industry will be felt for quite some time. This is one of the largest acquisitions in Disney’s recent history, surpassed only by its acquisition of Pixar for $7.4 billion in 2006 (and I think it’s safe to say that deal had a pretty significant impact on both companies involved).”